While working with a colleague they were obliged to attend an online workshop regarding the merger between CCW and CSM foundation courses. Due to my pay grade, I was not invited to the workshop despite AL’s making up a significant proportion of the course staff population. This was the third in a  series of “visioning” workshops for the new course. The host aimed to get “imaginative”, “brave” and “forward” thinking as to the shape of the new course. However, the relationship between the participants and the host was cold, and reticent resulting in responses that were more concerned with the practicals of what there actually is rather than what we could have. 

I include this because I consider it a factor that is influencing my attitude towards teaching and the institution. The merger itself doesn’t fill me with optimism. I don’t trust those who have the greatest influence directing the course. There is a massive disconnect between those who need to deliver the course and those who make the big decisions. Much of the ways these people talk and communicate is through opaque language that is often utterly meaningless to the people it affects. I speculate and felt the host was in fact using the input from the participants to inflate themselves and their achievements for a future job.

The effect of this on my teaching is “fuck the institution, let’s make the year the best we can, I might not be teaching anyway next year. In a way, this attitude has resulted in a more adventurous way of teaching and the group has reflected this with positive results.